Frances’ Macaroni and Cheese
“Frances!” I jog her down, catching her in the foyer of The Church of Jesus Christ.
“Frances, your macaroni and cheese was the star of the show again at Disciple’s Kitchen on Thursday. I’ve just got to have your recipe!”
Black ringlets sweep back proudly from her brow, a touch of grey at the temples. She looks a little exasperated, as we’ve had this conversation before. “It’s an old family secret.” She’d told me.
“But Frances,” I had countered, “What if there’s a time you can’t come?”
She considers me a minute with kind, dark eyes. “Alright. I don’t have a recipe, but I’ll tell you how to make it.” Wide-eyed, I listen intently, realizing that I am, in fact, receiving my first Oral Tradition recipe.
The Visualization
A chronic list-maker, I’m fighting down panic as I try to lock the details away in my memory, no tangible backup present. She speaks slowly and methodically, making eye contact and watching for understanding.
A scene opens to my mind: A younger Frances, in her kitchen at home, aproned and floury. Her wise hands enfold a pair of little ones, helping as they whisk the slurry, bending over the pan as the magic is assembled. “A little more cheese,” she instructs, “’til you can’t see the noodles underneath.”
“A little more cheese,” she instructs, “’til you can’t see the noodles underneath.”
Frances
Sensory instructions like “a good amount” and “cool it a bit…” are common in her explanation. I can see that this is a thing to be learned hand over hand, time after time, together with your loved one. It’s in a family’s collective memory and microculture. I know I can’t have that experience, and I am honored that Frances tries to share it with me anyway.
Into the Kitchen
As soon as I get home, I gather ingredients on the counter and make an attempt. I have to go slowly, listening for her words in my memory. I am surprised to find that the process is as much a part of the joy as the eating. My time in the kitchen typically looks more like an escape attempt than a practice in contemplation.
It didn’t turn out quite right.
Capturing the Magic
Over the next month, I make Frances’ mac and cheese every week, tweaking and slowing and remembering. It gets better each time. Last week, I got close. Close enough to try and write it down. My traditions are different than hers, and things must be recorded to be remembered, used, and honored.
“My traditions are different than hers, and things must be recorded to be remembered, used and honored.”
It’s not the real thing, I’m afraid. I give you what I have, knowing that without the familial experience, it will never hold the magic it should. Next week, I’ll show my daughter. Perhaps she will remember my hands over hers.

Frances’ Macaroni and Cheese:
Ingredients
- 1 1 or 1 1/2 lbs. Macaroni noodles cooked;
- Garlic powder
- Onion powder
- Salt and pepper
- 2 eggs whipped
- 1/2 cup cheese
- 2 tbs butter melted
- 1 1/2 lbs. Sharp cheddar cheese about 1 1/2 lbs., shredded.
- 1 1/2 tbs flour
- 3/4 cup Milk
Equipment
- 1 9" x 13" Casserole Dish
- 1 Cheese Grater
- 1 Colander or Strainer
- 1 Whisk
- 1 Wooden Spoon or Heat-Resistant Spatula
- Measuring Cups and Spoons
- 1 Small Saucepan
Method
- Layer half the noodles in a greased 9×13 dish. Sprinkle with spices. Cover with about half the cheese. Make sure to cover the noodles. Add another layer just like the first. 1 1/2 Tbsp butter 1 1/2 Tbsp flour 3/4 cups milk

- Make a slurry by melting the butter, adding the flour, and cooking over low heat til it bubbles. Slowly add the milk, letting it thicken as you go. Cool the slurry a bit and add:

- 2 eggs, whipped
- 1/2 cup cheese
- Whisk in the eggs slowly, add the cheese. Pour the mixture over the noodles and cheese.

- 1/2 cup butter, melted. Pour the melted butter over everything.
- Bake at 350 for about 30 minutes, covered. Uncover and bake 5 more minutes, lightly browning the top. Stir gently before serving.

Notes
Frances’ Kitchen Wisdom: Tips for Success
- The “Hidden Noodle” Rule: When layering, don’t skimp on the cheese. As Frances instructed, you need “a good amount,” specifically enough so “you can’t see the noodles underneath.” If you can still see macaroni, add more cheddar.
- Temper the Slurry: The recipe calls to “cool the slurry a bit” before adding the eggs. This is crucial! If the flour/milk mixture is too hot, the eggs will scramble immediately. Let it sit for a few minutes, or whisk a tiny amount of the warm sauce into the eggs first to bring them up to temperature slowly.
- Slow Down: Frances spoke “slowly and methodically,” and the cooking process requires the same pace. When making the roux (butter and flour) and adding the milk, keep the heat low and take your time to ensure it thickens without burning.
- The Final Resting Stir: Unlike many baked mac and cheeses served as a solid “brick,” this one is gently stirred after baking. This distributes the melted butter and the browned bits on top, ensuring every scoop is creamy and flavorful.



